You say you feel you fear you love me

Once I tell you of all the sorrows because of you

You say you feel I should refrain from you

You say too much is unacceptable.

I believe you hurt me too much

You are true and my love unmistakable

‘Too much love’ you say-there is nothing as such.

Not many feel the soothing warmth of the moon.

Beside you, I feel the world will be ours soon

The ones who wouldn’t feel,

Are they the ones who are real?

Are my dreams immaterial?

Do you feel?

Pain does make me grow.

I do bear unlimited sorrow.

So much that I sometimes wonder

If my love is not for the goddess of thunder/

As you walk silently past my door,

My heart remains brimmed with tears,

And follows your soul without fears.

And is trampled by your sole even more.

The cold pale moon gives me warmth.

Your warm crimson heart,

More hurt.

Still I choose to love you and not cry for the moon.

I know your tear will be dry soon.

I will love, get hurt, and grow again.

You will be my happiness, yet my pain.

My innocent heart will suffer, and sustain.

If you’ll be happy, I will refrain.

I will love, though I die again and again.

when your eyes shine the happiness.

Carry me in your arms

when your heart desires my heart’s warmness.

Carry me to hell

when you desire to be unhappy.

Carry me to eternal fire

When your heart desires to be carefree.

When you experience love,

My love, you carry me to heaven;

But when my heart deceases,

You can make my heart diamond laden;

When you feel hell, my love;

You take me to the extreme of my pain.

And when my heart lives;

You have nothing to gain;

And you felt it; and I had nothing to explain.

In saying that you and I are one!

We have gone in separate paths,

Faced numerous wraths.

But just as surely as we are born,

Some day we will be gone.

Our minds may wonder in the same plane

Or may even not exist again

But our bodies will surely decay,

Tomorrow will be fertilizer of what is living today.

Slowly but surely we become parts

Of newly born plants

We learn the art of listening,

Patience and the pride of belonging.

Then we enter again,

Into the vast food chain

And thus, over hundreds of years,

I am a million things, it appears!

And you are also ever-changing.

Thus I feel this sense of belonging.

That you and I are not separate.

To say that you are you is not accurate.

As I am a product of an ever-changing mold

I am in you, this without doubt I hold.

As we belong to this world forever,

We are merely a part of a river.

At any point seeming the same,

Yet at no point ever the same.

We belong to the same world,

Of the universe of a single mold.

I can be compared to none,

But, without a doubt,

You and I are One.

Stars did blanket the skies

And love did silently sing

Of the sparkles in your starry eyes

The dew-drops gently drooped

Of dreams beneath dreamy lashes,

My heart crashed on your shores

Like moonlit wave still crashes,

Still,

My musics were still.

And with every ripple of your smiles,

With every tiny steps through the isles,

My words you would kill.

My emotions you would feel,

But I could not release the truth.

What you conveyed stood still,

Yet with each passing silence,

My truth has begged for your absence.

When have you last drenched yourself in rain?

When have you last heard the singing of a dove?

When have you last smiled in pain?

When have you last wondered where I might be?

When, my heart, have you last thought of me?

When, my precious gem, do you think about the past?

When, my evergreen rose garden, are you confused; and distrust?

When, my rain of happiness,

Have you last been accused?

When, my love song,

Have you last been abused?

When, my innocent heartache,

will you realize

The pain my heart takes,

When your thoughts arise?

Who knew yesterday

Where the road would lead

Some mighty force has decreed

That we’d be forced to frown today…

Never could find the words

That would overcome the boundaries

Of the heart,

How could one express the seamless feelings,

The love, the hurt,

When bounded by words.

Blind mute and clueless, I trudge on.

And I realize I’m not the only one.

Everyone keeps building boundaries.

Perimeters, so that their being lost would cease.

Limited by what can be seen only by the eyes,

Our imagination silently dries and dies.

I dream wonderful dreams

As solid as reality it seems.

All the happiness, all the screams,

Unravels at consciousness’s seams.

Bounded by money and laws,

We forgive our own flaws.

Forget what we held so dear,

We set our own goals,

Overlooking the resultant tolls,

Failure to achieve them is what we fear.

I took away all boundaries and borders.

In doing so, I set new ones unknowingly.

I find that whenever a norm alters,

My reality falters accordingly.

There was God and the devil;

And you and me.

Gathered to gain wisdom;

Under the wisdom tree.

The tree of wisdom spoke to me:

“If you were to choose betwixt God and she;

What would thy choice be?”

“Thinking of God brings me peace,” I said,

“She brings joy and laughter to me.

“He is mighty and powerful;

And so vulnerable is she.

“He is all knowing, all forgiving;

And so naive is she.”

And with these words my love

I chose you to He.

The devil laughed a laugh of triumph;

But God smiled at me.

For the depth of my love for you;

Only He can see.

Searing Pain,

Thirst

While drinking,

I remain thinking…

Which came first!

Which will remain

Beyond reason

I commit treason

Mud my soul

With no one to console.

With the thirst quenched

Should I thirst again

To be able to feel

The pleasure

Of quenching the thirst?

Which comes first?

The light in the room becoming dimmer.

Makes me wonder how the bright

fades away the dim.

And the day keeps on dawning.

The brightness proud of its glory.

The gray sky blooming blue and white flowers

Not caring if we all share its beauty.

The sleepless creatures making merry

As the darkness is conquered by light.

But I stayed awake all night.

And the pains of day are for me to carry.

Keeping the balance between truth and reality,

I travel on the razor’s edge-

- each step bleeding the side effects of consciousness.

If I fall I pray that it be in the night.

For I have no victory to proclaim;

No demands to make; no defeat to resent.

So that I may be overcome and forgotten

In the bright glory of

The New day to come.

And I did till blood had seized to spill.

Thus, my conscience was killed.

“Care to feel the love of a woman?”

And I felt till love ended and sorrow had begun.

Thus, my heart was killed.

“Care to see heaven and hell?”

And I tripped till I understood everything too well.

Thus both my courage and hop were killed.

“Care to see death?”

‘And what is this I feel in my every breath?’

“That is life, the opposite of death.”

‘Then show me death! Give me death!’

Thus, my death was killed.

And I continued to live!

For this is the way I could see death,

While I was alive.